Saturday, July 30, 2011

The Heart of the Issue

  So my dad took away my phone yesterday. He said that I have been on my phone a lot the past few days. I have been down because of strep. But I was aching and hurting so bad that talking to someone helped distract me. I had to go to work without my phone and when I got home we had a little chat. My parents had got into my phone and read my messages. And they wonder why I don't trust them! I feel like my privacy has been violated!
  My mom will be leaving soon and my dad will be working. I decided to be home schooled because its what my mom wanted me to do. Everything I do; everything I decide is because of what my mom wants me to do. I'm sick of living under that shadow of my family. I wish I could be ME. My mom I believe has the reigns too tight. Its not wings that I want, I want to be me. I want to hang out with my friends, I want to bee able to work, I want to be able to at least TALK to my friends without my parents getting suspicious.
  But what is the REAL issue here? I guess it looks like mom vs. daughter. Mom's will to not give me some freedom and trust or the daughter who just wants to be her own person. Not necessarily have wings but wants to be her own person.
  Last year I went to in self destruct mode. It wasn't healthy. And about 6 months ago, it was worse. My best friend has been there the whole time and I am so thankful for that. My parents think that something else is up and nothing is. They think that I'm isolating myself from my family and I'm not. I guess when you stand aside and watch your OWN life, you start to notice where your priorities lie. I love my best friends. And if they get taken away from me, I  have nothing. So I guess the real question is this: is it worth it? Lets hope so..


  1. Ouch, that must have been pretty.. interesting.. having them read your messages. :-( Hope you get your phone back soon!

  2. haha it was interesting. I hated it.